[It's curiosity and stubbornness. The facility in Mexico City was so limited, everything was drab and meaningless, routine with no end in sight. The world outside is bursting with so much possibility that she occasionally feels overwhelmed by it. How can the world be so big?]
[It's what makes the comic books Gabriella gave her essential. They're a guide. Even if they aren't entirely accurate, they're something. So when Logan asks if she's read about the school, she nods with more open enthusiasm than she usually lets on. Her sunglasses knock around on her face, almost sliding off her nose.]
[ it doesn't surprise him she has — or even that it's appeared in those stupid books. he'd read a few when they'd found themselves in his hands, and had discarded them pretty quickly when he realised just how close to the truth they were — and just how inaccurate they were, too. none of his teammates ever came back from that one last blow, not like they do in those stupid books, constantly being resurrected like death's beyond them. ]
[ he breathes out through his nose, looking at the stupid birds. ] I liked that place. [ if he liked anything, it was xavier's institute, the first place in a long while he'd been able to call home. ] You would've liked it, too. It's one of the only things those stupid books got right.
[She can appreciate that, certainly. She knows the books aren't true in the way pain is, the way fighting and fear are, she knew that before he told her. They're just all she has for a guide to the world, and she'll cling to that for as long as she's able.]
[The idea that they actually got something right is- well. She doesn't want to get her hopes up.] How? [Again, she's reticent to ask too openly. That can always be used against her. But curiosity wins out today.]
[ logan regards her with an arch to his brow, ] How?
[ sometimes he thinks he got her a little better when he thought her mute. the stern crease to her brows and the tightness to her jaw is a language he understands. anything and everything else is still something he's got to learn. ]
[ he decides to go out on a limb, wondering if they're even on the same wavelength. ]
[Laura nods, again with a highly childlike enthusiasm. She wants to know about this fabled place where mutants are safe, welcomed, even. This place where it's alright to be... whatever you are.]
[One detail sticks out as paramount.] You went there?
[ for as long as xavier could make him stay. often he'd make it out like it was a big drama he was lingering in those four walls, but he'd come to enjoy even cyclops' presence. it's a time logan wishes he hadn't taken for granted, but he supposes that's the way their lives work — you don't know what you had until it's gone, especially when you live long enough to know nothing else will compare to it. ]
Your comics got it right. Big mansion, roomy. Lots of kids running around. This one kid controlled the TV, so you could never watch what you wanted to because he'd blink and change the channel. [ he remembers with fondness, perhaps an uncharacteristic upward curve shaping his mouth. ]
[ he rips some bread and doesn't throw it, as though he's lost all energy to. his demeanour sinks, similar to that moodiness that generally seems to follow him. ]
[Laura interprets nowhere else to go as it was the only safe place. To her, one naturally leads to the other. She nods and eats another fistful of bread. She needs it more than the birds.]
That is what makes a place good. [The safety. Worrying over a lack of choice doesn't occur to her.]
[ logan can't quite deny that, but what makes it good also makes it a target. the amount of mutants living under that one roof had put a bullseye on it, and those like stryker had used it as target practice to not only try and lure out the wolverine, but the man who sat at the head of the dinner table. ]
[ it's on the tip of his tongue to tell her that, but logan's learned quickly this kid has had very little to hope for. after already declaring those stupid comic books are just that — stupid — he's decided to take a more active approach in discerning what he'll tell her is bullshit, and what he'll let her believe is okay. ]
[ that mansion was okay. he honestly wants to believe that. ]
[ he doesn't look at her. ] It doesn't exist anymore. The old man would've insisted I take you there if it did.
[Laura nods, solemn for a pre-teen. She understands, even if he thinks she doesn't. She can see something like regret cloud over his expression. He misses them.]
Está bien. I would not have been good there.
[She knows how she is around large groups of people. She turns back to her birds.]
If you're anything like me, you would've found your place.
[ says the most antisocial, anti-working in a group, anti-everything the x-men stood for, if logan can fit in with a bunch of misfits who believe the best in life while he only expects the worse, he thinks this kid can, too. if charles is right in her being incredibly like him, he knows she's selling herself short right now. ]
[ he looks at her briefly, then back at the birds. speaking of the x-men makes something feel heavy and uncomfortable inside of himself, but he figures it's only good if he gives her some sense of peace — whether it be faith in those stories or realisation she's close to what she had idolised. ]
[ for a moment he's quiet, then he thinks on what little he knows of her. ] You've got your friends. You were good there.
[Laura just shakes her head, unhesitating. This is something she's thought about for hours and hours, filling the gaps in long silent car rides, or nights when doctors in sweeping labcoats haunt her sleep.]
That's different. We don't save people. We run.
[It's said without judgement. Laura has never cared about saving people. It's noble, she thinks, a good thing to do, a great thing, but it's not her.]
[ despite knowing what the x-men were all about, logan still signed up to join a team of powerful heroes. he'd call storm, cyclops, charles, jean all heroes, but he'll never include himself. perhaps that's a genetic thing, or maybe the way they've been shaped is merely another similarity born from coincidence rather than genetics. ]
You save each other. That's got to count for something.
[ he suspects the old man would be proud of him for saying that. logan throws more bread at the birds, the chunk falling behind them rather than rolling in front of them. ]
[ logan's beginning to wonder if the throbbing pain in his head when he speaks to her is what others experienced when trying to reason with him. karma is a bitch. ]
I know what's best. You don't. Start asking and following what I say.
[ yes, he doesn't make good choices. he hates that he openly admits that to her. she's meant to believe he makes the best choices, that he knows everything. whatever happened to that childlike belief? ]
And you make shit ones, too. It's in the DNA.
Listen to me. I'm older; you have a problem with one of my choices, you tell me, and I'll reconsider it.
[for the sake of my own sanity let's just assume they're still speaking spanish because we've exhausted my limited vocabulary, eyyy.]
[So she shows up a few minutes later, inspecting the kitchen very tentatively. She's never quite gotten over the urge to enter rooms slowly, observe them carefully, and scout out all the exits in advance. You never know.]
[When she does finally cross the threshold, it's immediately to his side.]
[Laura can guess that the past tense doesn't mean his daughter no longer cares for the stuff. They're mutants, after all. They're absurdly skilled at dying, and when they fail to do so, having dead loved ones.]
[She's seen too much of that to be phased by it, and anyway, she's far too distracted by the scent of apples wafting in. She stares at the little cup in her hands, and narrows her eyes. Measuring things is boring.]
I said I would cut. [She raises a little fist, but doesn't extend her claws. Not yet, anyway. She doesn't want to be mistaken for a threat.]
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zvi
no subject
Date: 2017-04-09 07:21 pm (UTC)[It's curiosity and stubbornness. The facility in Mexico City was so limited, everything was drab and meaningless, routine with no end in sight. The world outside is bursting with so much possibility that she occasionally feels overwhelmed by it. How can the world be so big?]
[It's what makes the comic books Gabriella gave her essential. They're a guide. Even if they aren't entirely accurate, they're something. So when Logan asks if she's read about the school, she nods with more open enthusiasm than she usually lets on. Her sunglasses knock around on her face, almost sliding off her nose.]
no subject
Date: 2017-04-09 09:53 pm (UTC)[ he breathes out through his nose, looking at the stupid birds. ] I liked that place. [ if he liked anything, it was xavier's institute, the first place in a long while he'd been able to call home. ] You would've liked it, too. It's one of the only things those stupid books got right.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-09 10:19 pm (UTC)[The idea that they actually got something right is- well. She doesn't want to get her hopes up.] How? [Again, she's reticent to ask too openly. That can always be used against her. But curiosity wins out today.]
no subject
Date: 2017-04-10 11:37 am (UTC)[ sometimes he thinks he got her a little better when he thought her mute. the stern crease to her brows and the tightness to her jaw is a language he understands. anything and everything else is still something he's got to learn. ]
[ he decides to go out on a limb, wondering if they're even on the same wavelength. ]
How they got it right?
no subject
Date: 2017-04-10 11:45 am (UTC)[One detail sticks out as paramount.] You went there?
no subject
Date: 2017-04-11 10:37 am (UTC)[ for as long as xavier could make him stay. often he'd make it out like it was a big drama he was lingering in those four walls, but he'd come to enjoy even cyclops' presence. it's a time logan wishes he hadn't taken for granted, but he supposes that's the way their lives work — you don't know what you had until it's gone, especially when you live long enough to know nothing else will compare to it. ]
Your comics got it right. Big mansion, roomy. Lots of kids running around. This one kid controlled the TV, so you could never watch what you wanted to because he'd blink and change the channel. [ he remembers with fondness, perhaps an uncharacteristic upward curve shaping his mouth. ]
[ he rips some bread and doesn't throw it, as though he's lost all energy to. his demeanour sinks, similar to that moodiness that generally seems to follow him. ]
I had nowhere else to go.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-11 11:47 am (UTC)That is what makes a place good. [The safety. Worrying over a lack of choice doesn't occur to her.]
no subject
Date: 2017-04-11 09:14 pm (UTC)[ logan can't quite deny that, but what makes it good also makes it a target. the amount of mutants living under that one roof had put a bullseye on it, and those like stryker had used it as target practice to not only try and lure out the wolverine, but the man who sat at the head of the dinner table. ]
[ it's on the tip of his tongue to tell her that, but logan's learned quickly this kid has had very little to hope for. after already declaring those stupid comic books are just that — stupid — he's decided to take a more active approach in discerning what he'll tell her is bullshit, and what he'll let her believe is okay. ]
[ that mansion was okay. he honestly wants to believe that. ]
[ he doesn't look at her. ] It doesn't exist anymore. The old man would've insisted I take you there if it did.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-12 12:43 am (UTC)Está bien. I would not have been good there.
[She knows how she is around large groups of people. She turns back to her birds.]
no subject
Date: 2017-04-12 10:10 am (UTC)[ says the most antisocial, anti-working in a group, anti-everything the x-men stood for, if logan can fit in with a bunch of misfits who believe the best in life while he only expects the worse, he thinks this kid can, too. if charles is right in her being incredibly like him, he knows she's selling herself short right now. ]
[ he looks at her briefly, then back at the birds. speaking of the x-men makes something feel heavy and uncomfortable inside of himself, but he figures it's only good if he gives her some sense of peace — whether it be faith in those stories or realisation she's close to what she had idolised. ]
[ for a moment he's quiet, then he thinks on what little he knows of her. ] You've got your friends. You were good there.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-13 12:50 am (UTC)That's different. We don't save people. We run.
[It's said without judgement. Laura has never cared about saving people. It's noble, she thinks, a good thing to do, a great thing, but it's not her.]
[She will never be a hero.]
no subject
Date: 2017-04-13 12:30 pm (UTC)[ despite knowing what the x-men were all about, logan still signed up to join a team of powerful heroes. he'd call storm, cyclops, charles, jean all heroes, but he'll never include himself. perhaps that's a genetic thing, or maybe the way they've been shaped is merely another similarity born from coincidence rather than genetics. ]
You save each other. That's got to count for something.
[ he suspects the old man would be proud of him for saying that. logan throws more bread at the birds, the chunk falling behind them rather than rolling in front of them. ]
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 01:54 am (UTC)you always say no
there is no point in asking
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 04:28 am (UTC)I know what's best. You don't. Start asking and following what I say.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 04:30 am (UTC)you drink and smoke and yell
this is not best
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 04:51 am (UTC)I know best.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 05:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 05:12 am (UTC)I'm still here. That's what's best for you despite me not believing it.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 05:14 am (UTC)i had to convince you
you didnt come up with it
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 05:19 am (UTC)Also the old man had to convince me, too. You don't get to take full credit for that one.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 05:21 am (UTC)i dont need your permission to go outside
i like outside
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 05:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 05:26 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 05:48 am (UTC)[ as long as logan can sit his ass down. this being old thing is starting to wear him out. ]
no subject
Date: 2017-04-16 02:03 pm (UTC)not as good as you
you are the best at what you do
no subject
Date: 2017-04-17 03:27 pm (UTC)There's a lot more you need to learn besides fighting, kiddo.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-17 07:03 pm (UTC)like what
no subject
Date: 2017-04-18 01:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-04-18 01:21 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-04-18 01:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-04-18 01:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-04-18 02:29 am (UTC)Look, Laura, I chose that because that's all I ever believed I was good at. Being good at offing people isn't anything to be proud of.
no subject
Date: 2017-04-18 02:43 am (UTC)college does not help that
no subject
Date: 2017-05-21 01:54 pm (UTC)escucho
this means i listen
you do not make good choices either
i choose
no subject
Date: 2017-05-22 10:58 am (UTC)And you make shit ones, too. It's in the DNA.
Listen to me. I'm older; you have a problem with one of my choices, you tell me, and I'll reconsider it.
A WEEK LATER this is what i get for being sick sorry
Date: 2017-05-26 03:09 pm (UTC)but i will not apologize
it is your fault
a bazillion years later -- i hope you are definitely feeling better now!
Date: 2017-06-17 11:11 am (UTC)It's everyone else's fault but anyone who's related to me and is me. Remember that one.
[ yeah, #loganlogic!!! ]
np np
Date: 2017-06-17 04:25 pm (UTC)and i do not need to apologize
no subject
Date: 2017-06-18 09:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-06-21 12:44 am (UTC)[definitely mocking him now]
no subject
Date: 2017-06-23 06:06 am (UTC)[ besides him. wonder where she got it from, logan? ]
no subject
Date: 2017-05-21 02:00 pm (UTC)[for the sake of my own sanity let's just assume they're still speaking spanish because we've exhausted my limited vocabulary, eyyy.]
[So she shows up a few minutes later, inspecting the kitchen very tentatively. She's never quite gotten over the urge to enter rooms slowly, observe them carefully, and scout out all the exits in advance. You never know.]
[When she does finally cross the threshold, it's immediately to his side.]
You have done this before. You cook?
no subject
Date: 2017-05-21 05:20 pm (UTC)[ He smiles and idly rests a hand on her head, just briefly. ]
This one was one of my daughter's favorites.
[ He says this, creaming together butter and sugar. ]
Will you measure out the flour?
[ He hands her a cup ]
Three cups in that bowl.
no subject
Date: 2017-05-21 05:31 pm (UTC)[She's seen too much of that to be phased by it, and anyway, she's far too distracted by the scent of apples wafting in. She stares at the little cup in her hands, and narrows her eyes. Measuring things is boring.]
I said I would cut. [She raises a little fist, but doesn't extend her claws. Not yet, anyway. She doesn't want to be mistaken for a threat.]
no subject
Date: 2017-05-21 09:29 pm (UTC)[ though he does have a few apples peeling over the sink that will be ready for her soon. ]
Thin, about this much.
[ He pinches. ]
And all the same size.